Barry Lane's-, After the End ... Teaching and Learning Creative Revision

[Mary Lynn]

Hi Everyone,
I read Barry Lane’s After The End- Teaching and Learning Creative Revision. Mr. Lane’s use of voice makes his book easy to read. Because I did my presentation on revision, I thought it would be appropriate.
In his book, Mr. Lane stresses that writing is basically all revision. He discusses growing leads from questions, using details to focus, and snapshots and thought shots. Each chapter has a narrative by the author, student samples and many activities and extensions that he recommends.
In his section on snapshots and thought shots, he discusses zooming in on a small moment of someone or something that the student knows well, and listing details, then free writing on one of those details. Thought shots are writing about what the character is thinking but doesn’t verbalize.
Lane also describes activities for “exploding a moment”, slowing down a description of an event that lasted perhaps only a few moments. Then he gives examples and activities to “shrink a century”.
Mr. Lane addresses peer conferencing, structuring writing time, grading and conferencing with students. He calls that chapter, “Don’t Fix My Story,
Just Listen to Me-A Guide to Conferencing and Codependency”. Love that!
In the last section of the book, “The Writer’s Struggle”, Lane advises on solutions for common student struggles such as an unwillingness to free write , reading self chosen books rather than basals, and the daunting task of revision. Then he discusses promoting voice in writing, risk taking, revising poetry and editing.
I really enjoyed the book. As a third grade teacher, I have to pick what will work, of course, however, Lane addresses fourth grade through college levels in his narratives.
My discussion topics are:
1. Do you use reading journals in your classroom? If so, how is that structured? Barry Lane suggests having students write letters to their teacher about the book they’re reading, in their reading journals. Have you tried this? How did it go?
2. Have you done an activity on “exploding a moment” or “small moment” stories either from Lane’s book or another source? How did it work for your students?

[Wendy Ritter]

Hello Mary,

Barry Lane's books are fun to read and packed with so many good ideas. I will need to make a point of taking a look at this one as well as some others I have on my shelf. The trick is deciding which ideas to use.

I have not done reading journals in my resource classes. What I have done, I don't think is considered a reading journal. In my resource class, I give the students a small packet with with some kind of template or just a packet of binder paper depending on my comprehension focus for the book we are reading. As we read each chapter, students then complete the template or make notes on the binder paper. With the last book I read with my 5th graders, students made notes of the big ideas of the chapter. Then, as a group, we created a summary sentence for the chapter using the big ideas. They were also to choose an event from each chapter and write the cause or effect of the event. Other times, I have had students write predictions or what they thought about the events of a chapter. When reading Owls in the Family, I let the students choose between writing the main events and what they thought or drawing pictures. Either way, students were expected to keep track of the events of the story and their thoughts. In using these "packets", I can informally assess the students understanding of a book and of the comprehension skills. The reading journals you mention sound like they are more for students' indpendent reading. I like the idea of students writng a letter to the teacher about their book. It seems more authentic than answering specific questions. Is this something you are thinkng about trying?

When I was working with the 6th grade class, I did an activity to help students expand on a small moment of their story. First, I had the students pick a memorable day. Using fragments or simple sentences, they sequenced the events of the day. Then, I had the students choose one of the events to expand. To help them make their choice, I had them think about the one part of the day that stood out the most, and what they really wanted to tell us about their day. That was the event to expand. On a new page, the students then sequenced just that one event, really stretching it out. When they wrote their rough drafts, the students put the events prior to the expanded event into a few sentences, then wrote all the sequencing to their one choice event, and concluded with a few sentences about what happened after the choice event. Although it took the students a few days to complete the whole process, I think it helped them to better expand the one important piece of their story. I was pleased with the results. I used the analogies of a chair lift ( slowing down to pick up the skiers) and the snapshot of a video camera ( stopping at that paticular moment of filming) to show how an expanded idea looks within a story. I would use this activity again at the beginning of the year, so my students would have all year practicing with expanding moments in their stories.

Enjoy these remaining weeks of summer,
Wendy

[Mary Lynn]

Thanks so much Wendy,
What a thoughtful reply! I will definitely try the small moment story activity with my kids next year...which is actually a few weeks away-YIKES!
The reading journal ideas are great and yes I am going to try the "writing a letter to your teacher about your book" idea.
See you soon, hope your school year starts off well, let's stay in touch.
Mary

Wendy Ritter said:

Hello Mary,

Barry Lane's books are fun to read and packed with so many good ideas. I will need to make a point of taking a look at this one as well as some others I have on my shelf. The trick is deciding which ideas to use.

I have not done reading journals in my resource classes. What I have done, I don't think is considered a reading journal. In my resource class, I give the students a small packet with with some kind of template or just a packet of binder paper depending on my comprehension focus for the book we are reading. As we read each chapter, students then complete the template or make notes on the binder paper. With the last book I read with my 5th graders, students made notes of the big ideas of the chapter. Then, as a group, we created a summary sentence for the chapter using the big ideas. They were also to choose an event from each chapter and write the cause or effect of the event. Other times, I have had students write predictions or what they thought about the events of a chapter. When reading Owls in the Family, I let the students choose between writing the main events and what they thought or drawing pictures. Either way, students were expected to keep track of the events of the story and their thoughts. In using these "packets", I can informally assess the students understanding of a book and of the comprehension skills. The reading journals you mention sound like they are more for students' indpendent reading. I like the idea of students writng a letter to the teacher about their book. It seems more authentic than answering specific questions. Is this something you are thinkng about trying?

When I was working with the 6th grade class, I did an activity to help students expand on a small moment of their story. First, I had the students pick a memorable day. Using fragments or simple sentences, they sequenced the events of the day. Then, I had the students choose one of the events to expand. To help them make their choice, I had them think about the one part of the day that stood out the most, and what they really wanted to tell us about their day. That was the event to expand. On a new page, the students then sequenced just that one event, really stretching it out. When they wrote their rough drafts, the students put the events prior to the expanded event into a few sentences, then wrote all the sequencing to their one choice event, and concluded with a few sentences about what happened after the choice event. Although it took the students a few days to complete the whole process, I think it helped them to better expand the one important piece of their story. I was pleased with the results. I used the analogies of a chair lift ( slowing down to pick up the skiers) and the snapshot of a video camera ( stopping at that paticular moment of filming) to show how an expanded idea looks within a story. I would use this activity again at the beginning of the year, so my students would have all year practicing with expanding moments in their stories.

Enjoy these remaining weeks of summer,
Wendy

[gisela daniel]

Hi Mary,
Yes, I do writing journals. My students write for 10 to 15 minutes every day about whatever they like. I encourage them to pay attention to what we are working on during interactive writing, spacing, capitol letters, whatever it is we are working on. They have to read it to me out loud when they are done before they can go to centers. When they are ready I respond to them once a week. They mark the page they want me to read and respond to. I think is a good idea to have them respond to a read aloud. I have them write an ending to a read aloud before I read it and they get very creative, I enjoy. I’ve never done “small moment” activity, I guess that something to consider, maybe for the end of the school year.

[Lisa Larson]

Hi Mary!

This is an excellent book and I'm happy to comment on it!

In response to your first question, I require my middle schoolers to write 2-3 sentences in their journals after their daily reading. It can be a text-to-self connection or merely a comment on something that is happening in the story. I skim them periodically and make notes in the margins for students to read. After finishing a book, I ask my students to write a 100-word review of the book on a Post-It which goes inside the front cover for other students to see. I've used the letter response before, but I don't do it too often. While this is an authentic writing assignment, and I'm always searching for those, students become resistant if it's the only thing that you ask them to do in response to a book - so my advice is to use it sparingly. And I never grade them because I want the focus to be on the enjoyment of reading, not the writing assignment.

In response to your second question, I call my "exploding a moment" lesson, "focus on five minutes." I created a PowerPoint with Disneyland as my topic (you would be amazed at how students can turn ANY prompt into a trip to Disneyland!). I start with a map of California and general writing and then get closer and closer to a ride where the true excitement happens - the five minutes. I've had huge success bringing my low writers up to average and my average writers to add amazing details. I can send you the PowerPoint if you're interested, or at least encourage you to create something of your own that will interest your kiddos and get them to throw out the fluff and focus on the real excitement!

Enjoy the rest of your summer!

Lisa

[Marcell Boyer]

Hi Mary,

I used to use reading journals where my students would write letters to me. They were required to turn in a letter every week. I broke them into groups for which day of the week their letters were due. That way I spread the number of letters I had to respond to out over the week. Because they were in letter format, I could get more personal with each student, encouraging them to go deeper with their connections or questioning or which ever strategy they were working with. Unfortunately, I never felt like they read my responses. I found myself writing the same things to the same children every week. I finally gave it up because truthfully, I got tired of having to write letters every single night. It was a lot of work! I encourage anyone to try it but maybe find a way so it's not so much work for you.

Marcell

[Amy Webber]

I read a Barry Lane book as well and really liked his ideas. I do not use reading journals in my classroom, but the idea interests me. Since Virginia Palmer is an at-risk school, the teachers are under the microscope from many people. Introducing a reading journal to my class would help reading comprehension and I could also make it fun by adding multigenre pieces. I like the idea of the letter to the teacher, but you could also teach the students to write a wanted poster for the villian in the story, a top ten list of things that happened in the story, or a poem of two voices using the characters in the story. Everyone wins! The students could have the freedom to respond to the literature how they want to and the teacher wins because they are writing in their reading journals.

"Exploding a moment" is a great idea. I haven't tried it, but would like to try. Lane included that lesson in the book that I read for the ISI, But How Do You Teach Writing? He suggested that the students bring an old family photo into class. The teacher would do the same and model how to "explode the moment" ("The girl in the photo looks like she is worried about something even though she appears to be having fun with the other girl..."). The kids get the freedom to pick their own interesting picture and also get the freedom to interpret the picture with whatever mood they are feeling.

Thanks for the great questions. I had forgotten about "the moment."